The Day I Ate Whatever I Wanted by Elizabeth Berg

Author:Elizabeth Berg
Language: eng
Format: epub, pdf
ISBN: 9781588367181
Publisher: Random House Publishing Group
Published: 2008-04-14T16:00:00+00:00

The next Saturday, when they’re out taking a walk, they decide to go to one of their favorite pizza parlors for lunch, but they agree they’ll only get a Greek salad. But then Marsha says she thinks she’ll get a seafood pocket instead. No potato chips to accompany it, no Coke, nothing like that. Water. Water and a little seafood pocket.

“You can’t have that,” Tom says.

Marsha lets go of his hand. “Why not? It just has a little mayonnaise on it. We’re allowed to have salad dressing.”

“Not the same,” Tom says.

“Is too,” Marsha says.

“Is not.”

“Is too.”

“Look,” Tom says, “I’m not going to argue with you. If you want a sub sandwich, get a sub sandwich.”

Marsha stops walking and turns to face him. “I didn’t say sub sandwich. I said seafood pocket! I used to get the spicy Italian, extra cheese! Now I’m only getting a FUCKING SEAFOOD POCKET!”

From behind her, Marsha hears the short, tight exhalations of a jogger. Their next-door neighbor, Marty, runs past them. “Hey,” he pants, holding up a hand.

“Hey,” they say back, together, and watch him run off. Not an ounce of fat on that one. Or on his wife.

Tom turns back to Marsha and speaks quietly. “Either you do this diet or you don’t.”

Marsha orders the Greek salad. And when she has finished she is no longer hungry and crabby. She is grateful that she stayed on the diet, and she tells her husband that.

“That’s right,” he says. “A moment on the lips, forever on the hips.”

What kind of weird clinic is he going to? Marsha wonders. “You already told me that one,” she says.

“Okay, then, how about this: Nothing tastes as good as being thin feels.”

Marsha thinks about this. Then she says, “Not true.”

“I know,” Tom says, and sighs.

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